karioke ( a.k.a funny things re-titled)
by Spazz the Dancing Idiot
Summary: kian is sing-ing and you couldn't guess what......please R&R and look out for my BONUS chapter after this....
1. raziel is up first

((disclaimer)) I don't own kain, vorador, raziel, janos. i do not own any of the song either. lol. But I own myself. Please enjoy!!!!!  
  
~ Kain parks the car ( mini-van ! ) everyone gets out. (no duh!) We walk into the karioke bar. ~  
  
spazz: COOL!!!  
  
vorador: common lets sign up for something.  
  
raziel: okay  
  
everyone signs up for something except kain ( hes a loser! and hes boring)  
  
janos: *jumps up and down*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~everyone sits down, gets some drinks. ( vampire drink: bloody marie! jk) , the singings starts. A couple of mortals come up and start to sing~  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~ kains sleeks away and signs up for something un-noticed~  
  
  
  
spazz: this is funny  
  
janos: i am your father! *points at vorador*  
  
vorador: oy....hes drunk again. no more star wars for you!!!  
  
  
  
**anouncer** would a Raziel come up here please, Raziel!  
  
  
  
~raziel gets up on stage, the lights dim~  
  
spazz: i wonder what hes going to sing?  
  
vorador: i have no idea  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
RAZIEL'S : OPPS!..... I DID IT AGAIN !! (britany spears)  
  
  
  
~raziel starts to sway (hes a bit drunk) and then sings....~  
  
  
  
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I think I did it again  
  
I made you believe we're more than just friends Oh baby It might seem like a crush  
  
But it doesn't mean that I'm serious  
  
'Cause to lose all my senses That is just so typically me Oh baby, baby  
  
CHORUS:  
  
Oops!...I did it again I played with your heart, got lost in the game Oh baby, baby Oops!...You think I'm in love That I'm sent from above I'm not that innocent You see my problem is this I'm dreaming away Wishing that heroes, they truly exist I cry, watching the days Can't you see I'm a fool in so many ways  
  
But to lose all my senses  
  
That is just so typically me Baby, oh  
  
~Repeat CHORUS~  
  
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah  
  
~voice over~ "All aboard" "Britney, before you go, there's something I want you to have" "Oh, it's beautiful, but wait a minute, isn't this...?" "Yeah, yes it is" "But I thought the old lady dropped it into the ocean in the end" "Well baby, I went down and got it for you" "Oh, you shouldn't have"  
  
~voice over~ Oops!...I did it again to your heart  
  
Got lost in this game, oh baby Oops!...You think that I'm sent from above I'm not that innocent !!!  
  
~everyone claps and raziel gets down off the stage~  
  
  
  
raziel: *blushing like mad* was i good?  
  
spazz: hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!! *roflol* yes you were!!!!!!  
  
  
  
~janos and vorador are speechless, kain is laughing his guts out~  
  
  
  
dun dun dun.............to be continued........dun dun..........  
  
  
  
PLEASE REVIEW!!!! WAY MORE TO COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *falls over* 


	2. my turn

((disclaimer)) I own nothing out of LoK ::picks up a rock:: shhhh. be very quiet..... anywho, i own me and not anyof the songs or characters. please enjoy...  
  
CH.2!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*since raziel was done and now is still drinking it would soon be someone elses turn to go up*  
  
janos: STAR WARS!!!!!!!!  
  
vorador: not again........  
  
spazz: *giggles*  
  
kain: *pouts*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(* anoncer : would a Spazz come on down, Spazz *)  
  
  
  
spazz: whoohoo!! it's me!!! *gets up on stage*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
SPAZZ'S I'M TOO SEXY....!!! (unknown)  
  
I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love  
  
Love's going to leave me  
  
I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt  
  
So sexy it hurts  
  
And I'm too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan  
  
New York and Japan  
  
And I'm too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party  
  
No way I'm disco dancing  
  
( vorador laughs )  
  
  
  
  
  
( i do a mimi strip-tease by throwing my jacket at raziel)  
  
(raziel blushes, kain shakes his head)  
  
I'm a model, you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah  
  
I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
I'm too sexy for my car, too sexy for my car  
  
Too sexy by far  
  
And I'm too sexy for my hat  
  
Too sexy for my hat, what d'you think about that  
  
I'm a model, you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah  
  
I shake my little touche on the catwalk  
  
I'm too sexy for my, too sexy for my, too sexy for my  
  
'Cause I'm a model, you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah, on the catwalk, yeah, on the catwalk, yeah  
  
I shake my little touche on the catwalk  
  
I'm too sexy for my cat, too sexy for my cat  
  
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat  
  
I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love  
  
Love's going to leave me  
  
And I'm too sexy for this song .....  
  
  
  
( i get off stage everyone claps ) (i gigle my brains out and retrive my jacket)  
  
  
  
  
  
(everyone gets more drinks)  
  
(* announcer : would a janos audron come up please, a janos audron*)  
  
  
  
(janos staggers up on the stage)  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
dun dun dun....yea you know what this means........untill the next chapter......... please REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'need REVIEWS!!!!!!!!!! 


	3. janos is ALIVE

((disclaimer)) I own nothing out of LoK anywho, i own me and not anyof the songs or characters. please enjoy...and KEEP THE REVIEWS COMMIN!!!!!!!  
  
CH.3!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *ON STAGE : *  
  
  
  
janos: MY PEOPLES !!! I AM DARTH AUDRON!!! *laughs & falls over*  
  
spazz: oy..vah.....  
  
*janos finally gets back to his feet*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
JANOS AUDRON'S : ALIVE ( P.O.D )  
  
  
  
(music starts)  
  
  
  
janos:  
  
  
  
Everyday is a new day  
  
I'm thankful for every breath I take  
  
I won't take it for granted  
  
So I learn from my mistakes  
  
It's beyond my control, sometimes it's best to let go  
  
Whatever happens in this lifetime  
  
So I trust in love  
  
You have given me peace of mind  
  
**yellling**  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
I can't deny you  
  
I feel so alive  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
And I think I can fly  
  
Sunshine upon my face  
  
A new song for me to sing  
  
Tell the world how I feel inside  
  
Even though it might cost me everything  
  
Now that I know this, so beyond, I can't hold this  
  
I can never turn my back away  
  
Now that I've seen you  
  
I can never look away  
  
  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
I can't deny you  
  
I feel so alive  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
And I think I can fly  
  
  
  
bridge:  
  
Now that I know you (I could never turn my back away)  
  
Now that I see you (I could never look away)  
  
Now that I know you (I could never turn my back away)  
  
Now that I see you (I believe no matter what they say)  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
I can't deny you  
  
I feel so alive  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
And I think I can fly  
  
**yelling**  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
I can't deny you  
  
I feel so alive  
  
I feel so alive for the very first time  
  
And I think I can fly  
  
  
  
janos: THANK YOU MORTALS!!!! *takes a bow and gets off the stage*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
everyone but janos : hahahahahaha!!!!! that was great!!!!  
  
  
  
*janos sits back in his chair and falls asleep*  
  
kain: *nervous look cause he knows hes going to go up soon*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
to be continued in ch.4..........vorador is next..........what will he sing......only I know for sure..........  
  
ps. i would of done a star wars like song but 'alive' was my first choice, mabey i'll do a fic about him singing a star wars song....... 


	4. vorador's sex appeal....

CH.4....  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
* kain is still looking nervous and is now fiddiling with his thumbs and im giving him a weird look.*  
  
  
  
(* announcer : would a volador....voravor...ah..never mind.....whould a vorador please come up on stage..would vorador please come up on stage..*)  
  
  
  
  
  
* vorador comes out of the bathroom ( he was drinking to much...) cause he headr his name, he does his walk thing up the stairs and accross the stage (use your imagination)...*  
  
  
  
janos: (snorring)  
  
spazz: (hits janos and tells him his son is up on stage)  
  
janos: (claps for no reason, untill i tell him he hasn't done anything yet) oh..sorry... raziel: ( hes over in the corner trying to hit on some girls, but no luck yet, hes making them giggle though )  
  
kain: (drinking like a mad fool)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
VORADOR'S : BAD TOUCH (the bloodhound gang )  
  
  
  
Ha-ha. Well now, we call this the act of mating. But, there are several other very important differences between human beings and animals that you should know about.  
  
I'd appreciate your input.  
  
  
  
( vorador gets right into the song instantly)  
  
  
  
Sweat baby sweat baby sex is a Texas drought  
  
Me and you do the kind of stuff that only Prince would sing about  
  
So put your hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts  
  
Yes I'm Siskel yes I'm Ebert and you're getting two thumbs up  
  
You've had enough of two-hand touch you want it rough you're out of bounds  
  
I want you smothered want you covered like my Waffle House hashbrowns  
  
Comin' quicker than FedEx never reach an apex just like Coca-Cola stock you are inclined  
  
To make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time  
  
Do it now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Do it again now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Gettin' horny now  
  
  
  
  
  
( a bunch of girls giggle and one falls over while in a daze...)  
  
  
  
Love the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket  
  
Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it  
  
Hieroglyphics? Let me be Pacific I wanna be down in your South Seas  
  
But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means small craft advisory  
  
So if I capsize on your thighs high tide B-5 you sunk my battleship  
  
Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip  
  
So show me yours I'll show you mine "Tool Time" you'll Lovett just like Lyle  
  
And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files"  
  
Do it now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Do it again now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Gettin' horny now  
  
  
  
( vorador starts to do the dance moves for the song..lol..)  
  
  
  
  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Do it again now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Do it now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Do it again now  
  
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
  
Gettin' horny now...  
  
  
  
vorador: thank you.everyone....( winks at a bunch or girls who start giggling like mad)  
  
  
  
*he gets off the stage, well actually i pull him off the stage...*  
  
spazz: okay thats enuf lover boy........!!!  
  
  
  
vorador: common....let me go!!  
  
spazz; fine.( i let him go and him and a bunch of girls go out back)oy...vah......  
  
  
  
janos: my boy....  
  
everyone but janos; shut up already.........  
  
  
  
(anouncer; okat that was.um..interesting....now would a lord kain get on stage....a lord kain...*)  
  
  
  
everyone; ????????????????wha..???? kain??????!!!!!!?????  
  
  
  
kain; excuse me...*he gets up on stage.....*  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
PLEASE KEEP THE REVIEWS COMMING!!!!! KAINS UP NEXT.CAN YOU BELIVE IT???  
  
  
  
i'll be putting up after this 5th chapter a list of all the songs they could of been singing.........untill then ta-ta my minions.......i mean vewers...... 


	5. kain has a vamp in his basement

((( hello people now thanx for all the reviews so far...i really appreaciate it. anywho this is the song i have picked for kain...now just remember he is really plasterd and i dont even think he knows where he is.....so hes going to sing the worst and the funny-est song i could find on the net. sooner or later the songs some of you suggested will be put up in future fic's cause some were great ideas...now dont go away just yet (i'm really draging this out arnt i ?) after this im going to have a list of all the songs that they could of sung, so use your imagination and enjoy the show.....)))  
  
  
  
CH.5  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
*kain is on stage, the lights dim, everyone is stupid-fyd cause hes up there and then the music starts......*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
KAIN'S : THERE'S A VAMPIRE IN MY BASEMENT !!! ( BY MONTY HARPER)  
  
  
  
*the music is really funny*  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
There's a vampire in our basement; my brother told me that.  
  
He lurks among the shadows. At night-time he's a bat.  
  
He's in his coffin sleeping. I know he's really there;  
  
I can hear his lid start creaking when I'm sneaking down the stairs!  
  
( kain starts to do a weird ass jig thing)  
  
Before you visit my house, there are things you ought to know.  
  
There are certain nooks and crannies where you really shouldn't go,  
  
unless you're like my brother, either dumb or half insane;  
  
in the basement with the vampire 's where he runs his model trains!  
  
There's a mummy in the closet down the hall from my bedroom.  
  
My brother says it won't wake up if no one bumps its tomb.  
  
It's somewhat safely hidden behind a pile of drapes.  
  
I can tell it's really back there from the smell that it creates!  
  
Before you visit my house there are things you ought to know.  
  
There are certain nooks and crannies where you really shouldn't go,  
  
so don't be like my brother; he takes bravery too far.  
  
In the closet with the mummy 's were he hides his baseball cards!  
  
There's a ghost up in our attic; she's been there for fifty years.  
  
My brother says she used to be the lady who lived here.  
  
I know she's really up there 'cause on quiet afternoons,  
  
I can hear the ceiling creak and pop as she glides above my room!  
  
Before you visit my house there are things you ought to know.  
  
There are certain nooks and crannies where you really shouldn't go,  
  
I worry 'bout my brother; when he wants to be alone  
  
it's the dark and ghostly attic that he likes to call his own!  
  
There's a little hairy spider living underneath my bed,  
  
and when I told my brother that he almost lost his head,  
  
so now he won't go near there, which is more than fine with me,  
  
'cause that's where I keep the comic books I don't want him to see!  
  
Before you visit my house there are things you ought to know.  
  
There's a ghost up in the attic; there's a vampire down below;  
  
there's a mummy in the closet; but the thing my brother dreads  
  
is the little hairy spider living underneath my bed!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
( kain waves his hands in the air and gets off the stage....)  
  
  
  
*everyone in the bar has there mouths wide open and still in shock*  
  
spazz; wha...........what just happend...?  
  
janos; i have no idea......  
  
*vorador is gone so he missed it all*  
  
*raziel is gone to doing you-guess-what with some fan girls*  
  
  
  
* janos kain and me get in the car (mini-van) and go home*  
  
* everyone in the bar comits suo-side cause it was so funny they couldnt take it anymore* * now if you look in the dictonary under karioke bar singing you will find a pic of kain singing*  
  
  
  
spazz: and im still horrifyd to this day...........................  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
THANK YOU PEOPLE, AND YES THE ENDING DOES SUCK, BUT WHO CARES, KAIN SANG THE WORST SONG I COULD FIND.........PLEASE REVIEW AND WAIT FOR THE BONUS CHAPTER OF ALL THE SONGS THAT COULD OF BEEN IN THIS FIC....... 


End file.
